laurenhooper:

awlhf:

supervengers:

omvr:

yo gettin married at 22 sounds a lot like leavin a party at 9:30 pm

yeah but you get to leave the party with your favorite person on the planet, and take off all of your makeup, and put on your ugly comfortable clothes and make popcorn and curl up in your bed and watch a movie, and have sex and go to sleep, idk how that sounds like a bad thing.

And everyone else just wakes up alone and hungover.

this is the best thing ive ever heard

greatwhiteprivilege:

guys are so full of shit “i’ll fuck you til you scream” yeah right you’ll finish in 3 minutes then roll over and sleep while i lie there trying to figure out when exactly you stuck it in